#033 Final Post: My feelings after the show

What are the feelings after the show?

At the end of the day, I feel really happy to watch my viewers interacting with my work. It is truly rewarding after all efforts and thoughts put into the work. I am also glad that I managed to continue working with the aspect of viewers' physical interaction and participation in my final year project as I have been very keen in exploring with the idea of Relational Aesthetics (coined by Nicolas Bourriaud) in all my artworks created in NIE. And I am really blessed to have found this little torch projector to supplement my work. The idea of re-using and re-creating a banal  gadget that can be found in the commonplace.

I've spoke to some of the people who interacted with my work and those who are parents would either say that their kids have this toy or that they want to get this for them. It's interesting to see how the gadget is equated spontaneously to a toy hence the user seemed to be transported back to childhood and playing  with it like an explorer. So was I when I was selecting, creating and installing those images. I was too transported back to times when I was much younger. These images thus become the 'shadows' and reminiscences of my childhood. 

Even though I didn't get to put up the work that I created with my virtual dad, I think its worthwhile to think in terms of having my dad participate in my learning and final year as a student despite the fact that he is not physically present in Singapore. Perhaps even if he is physically present here, he might not be able or willing to participate so actively and directly in what I was doing. Moreover the act of projecting his image on the walls at home made me feel as if he was actually present with us.

How do I feel when the challenge has past?

The most challenging part in this process was the the 'elimination' round or rather the time I had to decide on the work that I want to present (refer back to post #028 Making a critical decision!). Even though I really liked my virtual photo-montages with my dad that was inspired John Clang's work 'Being Together', I am glad that I finalized on this piece of work instead of the one on the virtual photo-montage because this is personally more genuine in terms of presenting the images what I have found during my exploration and investigation process and also allowing me to continue my preference of  interactive work.

Going through the process made me realized this is how my students will be going through during their art coursework. The process of exploration would always lead to a process of being critical about one's idea and work in order to reach the final presentation point. Furthermore, because I chose to work with a subject matter that is quite personal so sometimes its hard to be critical and separate my personal engagement to presenting for viewers' engagement. This is something that I must considerate too as a teacher in the future. So for me having past the challenge I can't help finding myself thinking about my role as an art teacher. 

With regards the process of exploration, I think that the previous module on interdisciplinary art still lingered as I investigated for ideas. I find myself unable to settle with what I am used to such as drawing or painting. I wanted to steer away from what I am used to during my exploration process hence I looked at works of photographer such as John Clang and artist Fumiko Imano's who uses her self-portrait in video and photography. This is an area that I would have avoided venturing into. Photography to me is no more about a piece of image, because one can actually intervene the idea of the image and manipulate its surface directly.Thus it also made me consider about how my other classmates have also extended the of conventional materials such as using folds and cuts to intervene a pictorial surface, in relation to crustaceans how one has creatively used other everyday material and made into crab like form or the other way around  using the shells of prawns and transforming it into jewellery. So this made me think about moving out of one's comfort zone in terms of the use of materials and reconsidering the meaning to a given theme. Hence would I be willing as a teacher to explore with my students more than just the fundamental of drawing and painting towards less conventional or integrating together with other mediums? I might not be good at it, but I should start somewhere, now here. 

Nevertheless this experience also made me think about the amount and kind of intervention a teacher should have in  a  student's creative process. And how can I help to make my students enlarge their thinking and art-making process. Of course I do know that all I have just commented is with minimal regard to the reality of teaching in schools so how would I manage? I really hope that I won't forget that through this experience I learnt that sometimes it really doesn't matter what others think about my work or the tangible results but its about feeling a sense of ownership and meaningfulness towards what I have created. The subject matter that I am using is this FYP was previously used in my graphic design final project back in NAFA. But being able to approach the same subject matter yet with a different twist this time round was really unexpected. Hence its not about a subject being overly used, but it is dependent on one's approach toward it. The same when I teach, the same topic might be chosen by several students so the challenge then would be how to approach each uniquely in relation to each child's individualistic response and engagement.

A page from Chapter Three in Xiao Ya Tou's Story, 2006, Graphic Book 

Credit: Photographed by Terence from an image of a series in Reminiscences, 2011. 

Although this is an end to a chapter, a new season awaits...

#032 What a surprise!

I found this video clip while browsing through my camera, I didn't know that while I was taking the projection photo-montage my camera was actually recording what I was doing the whole time, it is under the 'movie digest' function. It is so interesting! I never knew my canon camera had this function that creates a video record of what I was photographing for the day. I could not upload the original file to blogger because it is in MOV. format so I used my mobile camera to record it into 3GPP movie format which blogger reads. It is really funny seeing myself running to and fro, changing my dress code, posing and re-posing till I get the image that I want.

It is indeed a pleasant suprise and encouragement for me because I didn't get to showcase this segment of my exploration during the exhibition but unexpectedly my process of making was actually recorded. So this is how it looked like when I was trying to photograph myself and my virtual dad. 

#031 Called to shift my work + Choice of lighting effect

I got a call on Wednesday to shift my work onto the other wall near the entrance of the second gallery. It is good in way because this time round I have an entire wall for my work. Because there is a hole on right side of this wall, I shifted my work slightly more towards the left so that visually it will not be affected by the presence of the hole on the wall.

The technician was not available to help me with the adjustment of the lighting, but thankfully my classmates and my mum were there to help me carry and support the gigantic ladder. At first I didn't want to have any light source but because the other works in the room had lights if my work did not, it is to my disadvantage. So I chose to adjust the light so that it shines only on the mini torch projector to prevent the light to pour over onto my cutouts. This is to ensure that the area where the cutouts are is dim so that when images are projected it will not be washed out.

Previous set-up at the corner of the gallery

New set-up location with larger presentation space & lighting effect shone onto the mini torch projector

I also tried out the projection of the images onto the cutouts. I feel that it is much easier now without the background as the viewer can focus on using the silhouette as a guide to fit onto the right cutout.

Viewer trying out the mini torch projector:

Effects of casting the projection on the cutout images:

#030 Redesigning the images on the dial disc

Taking heed to Paul's advice about removing the background of the images that will projected, when I referred back to my sketch book, I realized I had this idea in mind previously too.

Thank God that I kept the remains from the cutouts of my old photos, so I could use it directly in redesigning    the dial disc. 

This time round, I increased the resolution of my template to 600dpi which really helped me to be able to adjust the images accurately so that when it is projected there will not be spilling of other images when an image is projected. On the other hand, because my background was white, I had to readjust the contrast of all the images of the figures wearing white in order to prevent the figures from blending with the white background. 

My first attempt making the dial disc with background::

 My second attempt making dial disc with background:

 My finalized dial disc without background:

#029 Finalized work & Set up

On the same day I consulted Paul, I finalized that I will stick to using the old cutout photos & mini torch projector.

Bye-bye texts...

 Bye-bye photo-montages...

Hello gallery wall, set up begins!

So instead of using both walls at the corner as I intended to, I decided to present my work on the left wall.

The shelf on the left is attached to place the mini torch projector. I like how the outcome looks on the wall with the center piece as the focal point while all the various images forming a rectangular border. Although the frames are of varied tones of white, they are able to compliment each other.

I also tried out my mini-projector, the space really need to be dim in order for the projected image to be more clearly defined.

Projection in a lit space

Projection in a dimly lit space

 Here is how it looks like when the projection is fitted accurately into the cutout image.

Paul suggested that the projected image should not have a background so that the silhouette is more obvious. Initially I thought that the background would help the viewer to better locate the cutout image, but his suggestion is valid so I would go back and re-design the images on the dial disc and try it out again.

#028 Making a critical decision! (Relating to future teaching process)

It was a very tough consultation session with Paul because I really had to narrow down to what I really want my viewers to see. I thought I would just be presenting how I intended my work to be but it turned out that I still need to consider more critically what I want to present. Paul's recommendation is to enlarge one photo and present it. But I just cannot come to terms with his suggestion because to me, my recollection of the past is not a single image but a collection of it. But I do agree that a large image would create a sense of focus and impact to the viewer.

On the other hand, I guessed I really struggled with his comments because my subject matter is really personal. The physical distance between my dad and I is real, so is the gap that is created because of the accumulation of time and space that is neglected over the last decade. Counting to date I have not seen my date for almost half a year and every time I look at the photo-montage I feel like a little girl trying so hard to make things 'right' again. Therefore at that point for me, both works need to exist as one because to me, they are a progression of how over the years despite the challenge of distance, I am searching of ways to re-unite the old times. The torch projection representing me searching and reminiscing about the past and the virtual photo-montage about how I am trying to overcome the challenge of distance through virtual means. That was way I chose to arrange my frames in a way that creates a rectangular border. Although the various frames are arranged freely and not constricted to a pattern, I ensured that there was a focal point by placing the largest frame in the middle of the arrangement. This is the compensate the lack of a focal point when presenting a collection of images.

Largest frame placed in the center to create a focal point

Nevertheless, I do agree with Paul that the video can be eliminated but I still wanted to keep both set of works. So I left the consultation in a dilemma and I felt really disappointed and worried because I thought my idea was alright and I could have set up my work on the same day. Recalling about it now, Paul is right why did I get so worked up about it? At least I had the luxury to make a choice between two works that I have created. Since I have already intended to set up my work on the same day after I consulted Paul, I took a short break to think about the work I wanted to present. I compared the appeal of both works to the viewer and decided to narrow to the piece with the old photos because the work must exist together with the audience. Since I came to NIE, the artworks that I have created would always revolve around the notion of viewers' interaction and participation with the artwork also known as 'Relational Aesthetics' (coined by Nicholas Bourriaud in his book Relational Aesthetics, 2002). So I wanted to retained this key aspect in my final year project too. Moreover in terms of authenticity, this work using the torch projection is something that really came out from my exploration without direct influence by any artists. As compared to the virtual family photo-montage, I drew the inspiration heavily from John Clang and thus I do feel restricted and did not really challenged myself to break the overall concept. Whereas, the cutout old photos and the torch projection still retained the juxtaposition of virtual and real with the addition of interactive element as the audience play a game of matching the image.

At the same time, relating back to my chosen theme of 'shadow', which represent a silhouette that can only be cast in relation to the source of light and a object and it is something that is fleeting and not permanent, so does my cutout represent the silhouette of the people representing the kind of closeness and relationship remain as a part of my memory that only exist in the past and is not permanent. The only way is to recall it is to be a explorer searching for a treasure, but as soon as the projection is off, so does the pretense that things are still the same ends. 

Another take away from this point that I have to critical consider what I want to present reminded me how it would be like for my students in terms of decision-making in the process of creating their coursework. For example like how Paul used analogy to enlarge my perspective when viewing my work and that he gave me room for me to make my own decision instead of dictating what I should do, how do I juggle with this when I am a teacher. Would there be opportunity for my students to reflect and decide what is best for their work or in order to go with what is the norm of getting distinction neglect the chance for them to develop skills for decision-making and a sense of ownership to their work?

#027 Two more images for virtual and real photo-montage & video record of the process

Continuing my idea on the virtual and real photo-montage, I needed to create 2 more images so that it will fit the arrangement of the frames I have in mind. When I referred back to the old photos, I noticed that my dad and I had photos taken during Christmas. Therefore while having a video conference with my dad I asked him to share photos that he took in China that showcase some kind of festive season so he sent me 2 photos taken during Christmas with his friends.

So I dressed up in my winter coat and scarf together with a Christmas cap while imaging myself in a cold country hearing Christmas jingles, but in actual fact it was really warm and I perspired like crazy as the heat was transmitted from the projection where I stood to take the photo running back and forth from the projection to the camera in order to check how the photo turned out.

For example: In this photo the cap I was wearing is black and made the image appear dark and my arm got cropped off at the side. So I had to reduce the size of the projection.

So I when to change to a red Christmas cap so that the image looks more bright and cheerful but this time round, I blocked my dad's face. So I had to readjust my poise and position.

Finally, after all the adjustment I managed to not block my dad neither did my arm got cut-off. For example as presented below, I have two images that fitted to the criteria of being selected. So I based my final selection by the expressions and poise of each figures hence I preferred the second image 'Christmas 2' instead of the first as my expression mimicked my dad's smile. These images that I have presented here are just one third of the total images I took for one projected image. Despite it being a tiring process, I enjoy it as I get to practice making decision by being critical in the selection of images in terms of the image that best represent what I want to say or portray.

Christmas 1

Christmas 2

Adding the Christmas photo-montage into the overall arrangement:

As Paul had suggested that instead of just projecting an image, I could project a video record of the process of creating my family portrait. Therefore I did a recording for my family portrait photo-montage. Because of the size of the file I cannot upload here so I will show the snapshots of it.

Referring to the family portraits taken when I was young I noticed that my dad is usually at right side, mum at the left and I am in the middle so I incorporated the same seating arrangement for our current virtual family portrait too.

I decided to select this photo (below) from all the other photos taken during the shoot because I like the poise of how my mum and I are sitting close to each other as I wrapped my hand around her shoulder also considering the similarities of our expression and smile. The first image is the original photo taken thereafter I cropped it so that the black strip and the text box is not shown.

Original Image

Edited Image (Finalized)

After looking at the image taken, I am concern and a little disappointed about the projection of my dad. It appeared rather murky and blur due to the quality of my dad's webcam and perhaps because our video conference was held at night the quality of the image is affected. On the other hand, I am not very sure whether I should use the video but I would just prepare it and consult Paul about it again...